Sunday, September 20, 2020

The year that never ends...

It is the first day of fall tomorrow...my favorite time of the year.  
Today, I have been fluttering around putting branches in vases and planning where I want the pumpkins to go.  Spoiler alert, I have a big fatty on my porch already.  Hopefully, there will be many more where that one came from because one can never have too many pumpkins inside and outside of the home..  It's still warm all day but the nights are getting cooler. My doors are swung opened with the September crickets lulling me too sleep. I feel nostalgic remembering my childhood home and listening to that same rhythm so many years ago.   I am buried a little deeper and feeling all cozy in my flannel jammies under my covers instead of flopped on top like a beached fish all summer.  It all feels relatively normal until I realize it's not.  The world is a topsy turvy and feels so out of control  right now and I continue to be in the eye of the hurricane.  We are still in the middle of a pandemic.  Charlie does school from home. He hasn't seen friends since last March when the schools shut down.  Nicholas is working as an analyst from our home.  Ella works at Walmart full time and we wait to see if BYUI will still be open in January.  Benjamin and Natali are at BYU in Provo as we wait for another shut down of the colleges. 
We still have to wear masks everywhere but most businesses have opened up outside.  Eating outside, haircuts outside that type of thing.  The streets are busier but most people work from home. California and Oregon have had the worst fire seasons in history and fire season has not even begun. (October is when it officially starts.) Our air quality has been horrible until a week ago but the winds shifted and brought with it a huge respite from the grey skies and some of the worst air quality since I have lived in California.  We all breathed a collective sigh as we took in that fresh air and didn't instantly have a headache, burning throat or achy eyes.  But that breath of fresh air is just a little break because our hearts know that people are still suffering and fires are still raging out of control all up and down the coast.  We have presidential elections in November and while I have always cared and voted...this one...this election feels like everything.  EVERYTHING!! I am worried for our country if Donald Trump wins.  It feels like this whole year has been such a crap storm and it would be just like 2020 to let this man win.  I know my vote does not count in California because we are a democratic state but please America... I am begging you... vote this man out!!!!!  He may act like he has your back but he doesn't and he will destroy everything we hold dear. See? topsy turvy and out of control are  putting it mildly but I still live in my little pear cottage safe from the storm outside.  Safe but unsure how to move forward.  Knowing and feeling my privledge and wanting to fight for those that don't. It's all just confusing. I am reading what I need to do besides sticking signs in my front yare...there has to be something...I have to do something to make a difference...something!!!

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